Ready to Drink - Smirnoff Vodka Mojito
Smirnoff Vodka Mojito
Smirnoff Company,Norwalk ,Connecticut ,
Grain, Unknown Type (Wheat ?)
PROOF: 30 (15%)
AGE: Not Applicable
TYPE: Flavored Ready to Drink Cocktail
PRICE: $13.00 - 750 ML
Notes: The designation "mojito" is a misnomer; mojitos contain RUM, not vodka. This would be closer to a gimlet - they are trying to dress up this abortion with a trendy name and bastardize mojitos - despite what the sullen argumentative oaf peddling this crap at a liquor store was trying to promote.
Appearance: Hazylight green white color- like a hair or dental product.
First Impression: Lime scented wax urinal freshener (those white waxy lumps in the urinal), industrial sanitizer / air freshener notes with wood alcohol / methanol overtones. Smells more like an industrial cleaning product than something you would voluntarily chose to drink.
Taste: Insipid, lime with wood chips or wood alcohol. Vile tasting lime tinged horse piss.
Drinks: No, none, not any. People have reported falling ill from this stuff (see below) - probably allergies - but it is irredeemably filthy tasting stuff.
Cigars: White Owl.
Final Thoughts: Vile tasting crap so foul that Amy Winehouse wouldn't touch after 6 weeks in rehab.This abomination does an extreme disservice to the term mojito. Rum producers everywhere should make an effort to find and lynch whatever marketing geniuses came up with calling this filth a mojito. Better yet drown them in this stuff.That is the only fit use for it.
My lowest rating, EVER!
For other similar reviews please go to:
(poor bastard suspects he was poisoned by it)
People on Yelp Food Reviews trashing it
Bottle: Tall glass bottle with angled rounded shoulders. Color of drink is similar to a cleaner of some sort.
Web site: URL too complicated and long to post. Does not seem to work anyway.
Who Knows? Blank page after intial bottle "gif" image.